Duane and I had the honor of attending the most incredible memorial service we have ever seen yesterday. Our son in laws mother passed into glory after after being diagnosed with cancer last month. For three hours we heard story after story about this amazing lady. Her legacy leaves a rippling effect far beyond the ten children she birthed. She poured her life out for her children and then for her grandchildren but she didn't stop there. She lived by the verse "Let the little children come" and as children came into her life she loved them and poured her life back into theirs. She served her family, she served her Awana children, she served the Chinese church here, and she served anyone and everyone that came across her path. She served.
As Duane and I looked around at the packed church with close to 400 people and standing room only we were in awe. All these people were here because her life touched theirs. Her small frame, maybe only 5ft tall, left a legacy that filled this church to the rim!
The entire drive home we talked about this service. Arlene wasn't anyone famous, she didn't live her life in the public forum but lived her life behind the scenes serving the Lord Jesus and serving others. She was welcomed into heaven and heard the Lord say, "Well done they good and faithful servant". 

Legacy....

It's a word that I chose last year to strive towards. I don't just want to live life I want to live a legacy life. Duane and I talked on the way home and wondered what our memorials would look like. Are we touching more lives than just our own family. Are we serving like we could be?
One of the most powerful quotes I heard yesterday was..
"You're not ready to live this life until you're ready to leave this life."
Am I living this life like I am ready to leave this life?
We have never walked away from a memorial service so amazed and inspired. I wish I had been blessed with more time to know this precious lady and learn from her. Heaven is rejoicing with her presence today and those here are encouraged and spurred on to live this life differently, to live a life of servanthood, to love unconditionally, to let our lives decrease so that His may increase, and we are reminded that we are to live a life the world views as backwards. The world says to strive to be greater but God says, the first will be last and the last will be first. I want to live backwards. I want to love hard and love all. I want to serve unconditionally. I want to live this life like I am ready to leave this life.❤

Four years of Joy

Yesterday we celebrated four years of life with Shandie Rhylin. Her name means "God’s Gift of Joy" and she truly does bring us so much joy!

I went into my pregnancy with some fear. I was in the middle of some chronic health issues and dealing with an autoimmune disease, I had hemorrhaged the last three births, and I was 43 years old. I didn't consider my age a factor at all but when dealing with the medical field your age can definitely make things tricky when I preferred to go completely natural and your health provider wants you to do every test imaginable! I was probably his worst nightmare as a patient because I said no to everything! 

I had a wonderful pregnancy with Shandie and ended up going two weeks overdue with her. My labor and birth was uneventful and I didn't hemorrhage with her! I pushed her into this world without the doctor being in the room and our sweet nurse caught her.

This brown eyed, curly haired beauty has been such a blessing to our family. She is all things girlie! Tutu's, baby dolls, ribbons and bows, and she lavishly shares sweet kisses with everyone she loves! The Lord has mighty plans for Shandie's little life! I absolutely love this tiny girl and am so grateful that God chose me to be her mama! 

HaPPy BiRtHdAy SHANDIE!!!

 

Memories

The other night my son pulled up my blog and we sat and had a walk thru memory lane. I started this blog in 2008. In the nine years since I've had three more babies, we've had three children move out, two get married, four grandbabies were added, we endured years of chronic illness and the stress that comes with that, we will soon have our fifth high school graduate, we started a home based business, and we relocated our entire family to a new state. Those are the most memorable and biggest of our memories over the last nine years but there has been so many smaller and equally special memories to fill in the space between.
I am so grateful for memories. The good and the bad. The ones that bring laughter and even more so the ones that still cause the tears to flow. No matter how much suffering you went through, you never want to let go of those memories. The hard times refine you and mold you into who you are even more so than the good times.
As our children grow and one by one leave the nest I find that I am on a mission...a mission to create more memories. To create memories that our children can carry with them as they start their own families, memories that I can think back to when the day comes that the noise and laughter of our busy home quiets down, and memories that can be shared and passed down with the generations to come. I want to create a legacy with our memories.
With 2018 just around the corner I am thinking about the bucket list I want to make for our new year and the memories that are just waiting to be created. I will continue to snap pictures of every smile and laugh and I will look for the moments that need blown on to create the spark that will turn into a fire of memories. We will gather together on Sunday evenings for our family dinners and laugh together, I will document life and I will purpose to create moments that will birth into legacy memories. I will hold the moments, and pursue the little things because these are the things that the greatest memories come from.

“Nothing is ever really lost to us as long as we remember it.” 
 -- L.M. Montgomery

Long nights and early mornings

The night was short and the morning came early. I had spent the second night in row up caring for kids that were throwing up.
I walked out of my room to find that one of the cats had thrown up in my hallway. I cleaned it up and headed into the laundry room and threw in a load. Then I headed upstairs to the bathroom to find a dog had left me a lovely pile on the bathroom rug. I cleaned that and then went out and surveyed the mess in my house. Two days of stomach flu can wear on a house!
Some would say that this sounds like a bad night turned into a bad day! Several years ago I would have viewed this situation as terrible! This morning I found myself praising the Lord for His goodness and for reminding me how far I've come! Just a few short years ago missing out on two nights of quality rest would have left me wiped out, exhausted, and most likely I would have ended up sicker than my kids! My adrenals were so weak and my body fragile. Today my body is in a completely different place!
I am only 18 months into my health journey with Plexus and I have come so far, but I know I have more layers of healing to go. I look forward to seeing where I am next year!
Despite how my day started I am so grateful for the Lord allowing me the opportunity to see just how far He's brought me! ❤

Miss Shandie

Shandie turned 10 months old last week. Time has flown with her! She is still a bit of a high needs baby and STILL has not gotten the memo on how much her mama would love it if she would sleep thru the night. 

(Sleep? What is that word I speak of???)

She is a joy, despite the sleep part, and has become such a funny little thing. I can't believe a year is just around the corner!

We have a tooth!

 

Life with Shiro

Life with Shiro can be very exciting. I think every Mama should have a Shiro in their lives. It is very refining and keeps you on your toes and also knees! I must say having a Shiro is not for the faint of heart though! Here is an example of a day with my sweet boy. These are some texts I sent to my hubby the other day.

Text #1

How's my morning going you ask? Well, your son pooped in his underwear unbeknownst to us and proceeded to take off his underwear and use a half a pack of wipes to clean himself. He then left said wipes in the reading book basket and the underwear with poop still in them on the floor next to it. He then sat on my coffee table to put on a brand new pair of shorts leaving smeared poop all over the table. He then pooped again. This time the poop slid down his leg and on the floor since he forgot to put on underwear that would have “caught” the poop. Unfortunately he stepped in it so everywhere he walked left a trail.

Text #2

Fast forward after the poop clean up and bath. I'm upstairs trying to get dressed and Shelbie and Shaylah are both gone, all 3 little girls are up in the bath and I realized that little boy had snuck out of the room. (I had been making him stay up by me) I come down to look for him and he's gone. I'm looking and calling and the big boys come out of their room to help. We look everywhere, by this time even Shayden and Shannen are sounding panicked. We check the pool, run down the road, we looked everywhere. Just as I'm ready to call the police Shannen says maybe he's hiding. I'm still outside looking down the road when I hear Shannen yell that he found him. He was hiding under the kitchen table the ENTIRE time! I will be taking extra adrenal support today!

Text #3

Newest update...he threw all his stuffed animals and some clothes into the full tub of water that I left when I went to go find him.

I should probably mention that these texts took place before 9:30am! To contain the little storm I contained him!

Look at this sweet face! Hard to imagine that he spends his days disguised as a tornado! Life would be so very boring without Shiro! I’m so thankful for this little guy!

One month old!

Sweet Miss Shandie is one month old today! In this short amount of time she has brought such joy to our lives. We can’t imagine life without her. She has grown and changed so much and I am so excited that in the next few weeks she’ll be smiling at us! I love her sweet smell, her soft hair, and there is nothing better than snuggling up with her to sleep. What a blessing she is!

Shandie Rhylin

As I sit here typing this I am holding the most perfect little piece of heaven in my arms.

Shandie Rhylin entered our lives, on this side of the womb, in the early morning hours Sunday, December 22. My birth with her was wonderful. Everything that I would have wanted in a homebirth I was able to have at the hospital.

We are all doing well and enjoying every minute of her. Thank you to all who prayed over me and this pregnancy. +

Shandie Rhylin Ney ~ God’s Gift of Joy

Born December 22, 2013 at 3:50 am

8 lbs 15 oz

20 3/4 inches long

Our baby

I said from the beginning of this pregnancy that I didn't want a sonogram unless it was truly medically necessary. On our last visit my doctor requested I consider one to rule out placenta previa. (No previa, all is fine :-)) Since we agreed to the scan we decided to go ahead and find out the gender, which is totally out of the norm for us. We wrote down boy or girl and had the tech circle and tape the envelope close. Our baby's gender is in this envelope! <3

As much as I would love to reveal this now I have to wait until I get to talk to Papa and Nana tomorrow.

 

Story time

Years ago story time at our local library was such an ingrained part of our week, but since the years have passed it has been something that has kind of gone by the wayside.  We’ve hit it here and there but nothing consistent like in the past.

This year I have purposed to once again make it a staple in our week. Instead of viewing it as something to do “if” we have time I am looking at it as part of school for my little ones.  We quit  going as my last batch of little ones started outgrowing it and losing interest. My newest batch of little ones LOVES it! It takes a bit a determination on my part to get out of the house and go. It has also taken a bit a managing of sorts to juggle the boys math class and piano lessons which take place at the same time. Fortunately we have a great piano teacher that comes to our home and doesn’t mind teaching my little ones first so we can run out the door to make it on time to story time.

The last two years I have really gotten away from the “fun” stuff with school. I’ve turned into a “let’s just get this done and over  with mom”, you know, the no fluff kind of gal. I saw Lolly start out so enthusiastic for school and watched that enthusiasm get snuffed out fast. I’m working hard at changing that and also not making the same mistakes with the newest enthusiastic kindergartener. It takes a bit of bending and sacrifice on my part but they are so worth it! \ Head, shoulders, knees, and toes…..

Still reminiscing here

Still sorting thru pictures here and reminiscing about past memories. Of course not all memories are wonderful like my “walk down memory lane” the other day. Some are not so great though we can laugh at it now, but I think we may have even laughed a bit when they happened out of utter disbelief.  That is exactly what happened to us last September when a horrible round of stomach flu paid our ENTIRE family a visit. Everyone was hit…hard! This flu was no respecter of persons.  The big down to the very little got it.  No one escaped except for Blessing (Praise the Lord!) who was only a month old.  Even Jeff, Shyloh, and Bodey were hit so they came here since our house is bigger and made a “safe” room for Blessing to be in away from everyone else. It was almost unreal. We’ve had bouts with the stomach flu here in Neyville but usually its spread out so Duane and I can tag team it. Not this time.  Whenever this is brought up around here we all laugh at how crazy this was!

The only good thing with this memory is that I was the last to get it so no one took any pictures of me! Hehe!!

A walk down memory lane

The other day I decided to tackle all the pictures that were slowing down my computer and put them them on cd’s. It took hours….really, hours! I survived though and even lived to tell about it! L

It was so sweet to see all the changes in my babies from just a year ago.  I don’t noticed them on a day to day basis.  I think sometimes its good to realize just how quick they are growing and changing.  It helps us put things into perspective and prioritize a bit knowing they are growing quickly and our time with them is short. 

      Bare with me…I’m almost done feeling sentimental!(This picture was only taken last summer) (This is this summer!)

This little guy is almost a (shh…don’t say it out loud) little boy. Ugh! In fact most people would call him that, but for now his mama will still call him her baby.  That may change come December.  We’ll see. \

Today…

+ Today I am 15 weeks!  I am loving every minute of this pregnancy and so thankful daily for the gift of life!  +

 

In the trenches

A couple days ago I met a young mommy with three little ones, a 7 yr old, 3 yr old, and an 8 month old. We chatted as we waited for our appointments. In the conversation she found out I was expecting baby number 11.  She was pretty shocked with that and said that she had made the decision to have her tubes tied after her 3rd baby.  She was exhausted, overworked, tired, and can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Later in the day I received an email from another mommy due with baby number 4 any day.  She too complained of being exhausted and tired.  After this baby she is also done.

One of the wonderful things with having 10 children is hindsight.  It’s really a beautiful gift!  These two sweet women can’t see the light because they are deep in the trenches.  I’ve been there and many times still feel like I am.  I know and remember very clearly what it is like to constantly feel sleep deprived, to be waist deep in diapers, nursing, homeschooling, keeping up the house, and still trying to be a wife. Those were very challenging years. I really questioned God’s thought process.  I clearly was the wrong lady for the task He set before me!

Fast forward to where I am now and I am so grateful I didn’t give up. I’m thankful that I didn’t make any permanent decisions regarding having future children when I was deep in those trenches. I see the light now and it burns beautifully bright!

I encouraged both of these mommies in the wonderful gift they have of being a mama. It’s not always easy but it is always rewarding, though it may be hard to see the rewards in the midst of blow out diapers, crying kids, and the burning dinner in the oven.  We can’t look at the here and now as this WILL change. Duane and I looked to the future. What did we want Christmas to look like here one day?  How many precious faces did we hope to one day see sitting around our table? Babies will grow, they will potty train, you will get a full nights sleep again. Teenagers will graduate, go off to college and marry. One day your house will be silent.  When they all come home for Sunday evening dinner and holidays what do you hope to see?

Hang in there mama’s! There is something beautiful outside those trenches! The rewards will come!

Today….

I am 14 weeks! We wanted to wait until we were in the 2nd trimester to share. We are elated and counting down the days until December! We had our first midwife appointment today and hear the sweet heartbeat of this little one! We are in love already!

Happy Birthday Shaylah!

Today our third little girl, who is now a young woman, turned 16.  Our world became a much happier, gigglier place when Shaylah entered our lives. She was such an easy baby and after she was born we said we would be content with never having boys as we were so in love with our girls!

Shaylah is so amazing and unique. She can dress up and be knock out gorgeous all the while throwing a baseball so fast and hard that it would cause a grown man to duck!

I remember as a young mom being told horror stories of what happens when little girls grow into teenage girls. I am so blessed to say that isn’t at all how it is here! I am so blessed to have my daughters be my best friends! It’s a beautiful gift!

Shaylah lights up our world and we are so blessed and thankful that God gave her to us! Her laughter is contagious and her love for the Lord amazing!

Happy Birthday Shaylah!

We love you with all our hearts!

Happy Birthday Poppet!

Eight years ago today, after 3 little boys, we welcomed the sweetest little girl into our family. Her birth was the first birth that I had totally natural and it was amazing!   

I had two miscarriages before we became pregnant with Poppet. Her pregnancy was healing for me. I spent so much time in prayer for her during my pregnancy. I labored at home for 14 hours before we went to the hospital where I had her 20 minutes later. Even though she was baby number 7 this was the first pregnancy and birth that I was informed on the dangers of vaccines and many other hospital “routines”.  We said to no to everything and signed every waiver there was to offer! 

My baby moon with Poppet was incredible! There were so many firsts with her…I co slept with her, I nursed on demand and not on a schedule, I mothered from my heart and instincts and not according to any books or other peoples opinions. I felt so free with her and fulfilled. I was more rested with her than any of my other babies!

Today Poppet is a sweet, sensitive little girl who loves to help with her little siblings and loves to help her big siblings. I can’t imagine life without her! She is such a blessing and I can’t wait to see what the Lord is going to do in her life!

Happy 8th Birthday, Poppet!!

  Poppet ~ 5 months

Poppet ~ 8 years old 

(Birthday lunch date with Daddy and Mama)

Why I Do It

“I hate homeschooling!”, came the ugly words from my mouth as I scampered around trying to collect all the school samples that I had to turn into our counselor at our meeting the next morning.  Why do I do this to myself? Wouldn’t it be so much easier to just put them all in school?

So why do I do this? I may have my down days and feel like I’m deep in the trenches. I may stress over children knowing math facts, or spelling properly and the thought of having to help with algebra is enough to make me cry, but yet here I am, going on 18 years of homeschooling.

When we started out we made a list of why we were choosing to go down this path that wasn’t so well beaten back then. We were odd in the sight of many and they questioned if we were sane or not. Sometimes I question if I’m sane for doing this! lol On those days when I’m questioning my sanity and feeling overwhelmed I think back to my list. These are only but a few of the many reasons we chose to home school.

~Character is not what you do in front of people, but what you do when you think no one is watching~

Is it enough that my children can read, write, and know their math facts? No. Education is so much more than just academics. It is mainly a matter of character development.  Here at home I have the privilege of teaching and training their character. Self-discipline seems lost with today’s youth, but it is needed in every area of their lives. Patience, gentleness, kindness have many chances to be practiced here at home with the people who stretch you most in these areas.

Do I want my children simply to be nice, well-behaved, and safe from peer pressure? Not at all! I want them to be men and women of integrity, not conformity. It isn’t enough for them to be polished and pretty on the outside but yet be dirty on the inside.

Neither academics, nor character, nor how polished they look on the outside will matter if they are dead in their sins and separated from God. I want my children to love the Lord with all their hearts, minds, and souls! I want them to shake the very gates of hell as they go out and boldly tell the world of the saving grace of the cross! Will public school help us in our effort to see these things come to fruition in our children's life? We think not.

God placed the responsibility for child training and our children’s education on us. This is not a task for the weak or the wimpy, of which I many times feel I am. It is a job we take serious, one that we are blessed to have been given. We don’t want mediocre for our children’s live, we want God’s very best. Homeschooling for us, is one of the vehicles God is using as we aim for the highest the Lord has for our children.

As I gear up, plan, and prepare for yet another year of homeschooling I am pondering over the reasons we do what we do. I need to remember these things. It serves to help me keep my eye on the goal. Not my goal, but His goal for my children.

A Blue Heart

They came walking out, her carrying her bright, food color infused ice-cream cone, and him grinning at the thought  of what Mama is thinking right now.

She had earned an ice-cream cone in a deal made with Mama to catch up on some school work that fell by the wayside during the crazy month January was. She was smiling ear to ear as she carried her prize out. I, on the other hand couldn’t believe my eyes! FOOD COLOR! EEK! For those who know me this is one of the five no no’s in Neyville. She knows this as did her Daddy so how is it she came out with “that” flavor ice-cream?

As we drove down the road to Wal-Mart, I rambled the entire time about how bad food color is for you and all the different diseases it is linked to. By the time we got out of the car her excitement was gone.  “I don’t want to eat this anymore!”, she said. In that moment I wished that I could take back the forest fire of words that destroyed her happiness.

We all went into Wal-Mart, Shelbie and I went one direction with Daddy and Poppet going another.  A few minutes later we joined back up and Poppet was ice-creamless. She had made the decision to throw her much deserved cone away.  I felt that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach that once again I had blown it in my mothering. 

As we walked thru the store I reached for her hand and apologized and she sweetly accepted.  I couldn’t shake that awful feeling even with the promise of non food color ice-cream at home and the toy she picked out in the clearance isle.  It was too late. In that moment of my spewing large facts on the dangers of food color I stole joy from my little girls heart. You can’t replace that.  I was so focused on some blue on her tongue that I didn’t see the red flame coming off of mine.

In the big picture a scoop of color should never have taken precedence over my little girls heart. There are no do-overs but once this Mama has learned the hard way about guarding my tongue. Words are so little but yet so big.

We went back today for blue ice-cream because there is something more important than the dangers of food color….relationships.

We walked in and I ordered a scoop of cotton candy ice-cream and Poppet sweetly looked up at me and said, “I would rather not have that kind Mama. I didn’t actually want it yesterday. I told the lady cookie dough please, but she didn’t hear me and gave me a scoop of cotton candy. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings.” Ahh, my little girl knows how to guard someone's heart more than her Mama did.  My children teach me well.

We enjoyed a lovely, food colorless, cup of cookie dough ice-cream together.  Best ice-cream I’ve ever had!